Health Hazards of Second Hand Bullets


SecondhandBullets

You cannot light up in any sort of public building anymore, but you can carry a loaded weapon pretty much anywhere you want, even into a bar in some states. It seems that our government is doing a bang-up job of protecting us from the dangers of second hand smoke, but what about the dangers of second hand bullets?

Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m not one to want to take away anybody’s rights, or “rahts” as they call them in some parts of the country, but I’m just asking:

Does your right to carry a gun override my right not to be gunned down?

The government seems to be so effective at enforcing some laws, yet others just go by the wayside. Even when gun laws are in place, the police seem helpless to enforce them. It’s not about people having guns, after all, it’s about the wrong people having guns. Total wackos seem to be able to get hold of guns willy nilly, and go about committing murder and mayhem in the worst possible places, like elementary schools and college libraries.

But seat belts — hey, everybody has to wear a seat belt. Click it or ticket, right? So maybe that’s the answer. We should pass a law that everybody has to wear a bullet proof vest when they leave the house.

“Are you wearing your bullet proof vest, ma’am?” the officer said, leaning into the car. “Because I think I can see your nipples poking through your blouse.”

If everybody had guns and wore bullet proof vests, then we wouldn’t have situations like we had in Ferguson, Mississippi, where the police inadvertently whacked an unarmed n’er-do-well — oh excuse me, teenager. The dude in question would have been wearing a vest, AND he would have been armed, so it would have been a fair fight. If, for some reason, the perp wasn’t wearing a vest, then it would have been his own fault because he was breaking the law by going commando. And if he didn’t have a gun, well then that would have been his own fault, too.

Of course, he might have fired back on the police officers, but hey, the cops get to wear vests too. It could all be just like a national game of laser tag, as long as no one started taking head shots. Imagine what sort of helmet laws we’d have to put in place then.

I’m getting a warm fuzzy, thinking about the darling little bullet-proof onesies, armor-plated strollers and Teflon teddy bears you could buy at the baby store. And what could be more exciting than picking out Baby’s first handgun?

Imagine the jobs we could create, for factory workers cranking out Kevlar vests. Detroit would be back in business, manufacturing armor plating and bullet proof glass retrofits for older automobiles.

We could solve the illegal immigration problem by making it against the law to sell body armor to anyone without the proper papers.

Back to second-hand smoke. My first husband was a chain smoker, and since everyone at work smoked as well, I was exposed to cigarette smoke 24/7. I went from being a perfectly healthy young woman to waking up one morning in the middle of an asthma attack. And if you don’t know what that’s like, imagine that you have a really bad stuffed up nose, and then put a piece of duct tape over your mouth and you get the picture.

A “specialist” diagnosed me with allergic rhinitis, and told me I was allergic to pretty much everything it was possible to inhale, including hog hair. Who tests for hog hair? This was L.A. — Los Angeles, not Lower Alabama. I asked the doctor if this sudden onset of adult allergies and asthma could have something to do with the cigarette smoke I was breathing in every day and he replied, “we don’t show that you’re allergic to tobacco.”

They wanted to give me shots, but I took the easy way out and got rid of the husband. After that I was fine. No more asthma, no more allergies.

That was in the ’80s, and now they know that cigarette smoke can trigger allergies, asthma and worse. Second hand smoke kills. And so do second hand bullets.

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One Response to “Health Hazards of Second Hand Bullets”

  1. lissaandpeewee Says:

    Freaking awesome post Peewee!

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