Hurricane Lissa

September 15, 2017

We just had the biggest hurricane ever

Irmato hit the United States, EVER, bigger, I’m told, than the state of Texas, twice the   size of Hurricane Andrew, and what does Lissa go and do?  She decides to go and ride it out at ground zero, in the Keys, virtually one key over from the bullseye.  Stupid, stupid, stupid.  Next time I see her, I will be hard put not to slap the back of her head, ala Agent Gibbs in NCIS.

Of course, she was lulled into a false sense of security when the storm was making for Miami — FALSE because hurricanes never go where they’re supposed to.  Remember Charlie?  And of course, she wouldn’t leave her dearest pal Lillian, who subsequently disappeared from the island without a word, and resurfaced in North Carolina.  I don’t know what went down there, but somebody’s in for a beat-down (just kidding Lillian).

Lissa quickly regretted her decision, and spent around 24 hours huddling with her dogs, listening to the bedlam and praying it didn’t rip her roof off.  She had to stay close to the dogs, because they had life vests.  Couldn’t figure out what happened to the human life vests, though.  Hmm.  Somebody who shall remain nameless had to go rummage around downstairs during the storm, trying to find them.

I spent a restless night on the living room couch, flipping through the news channels, watching the flying weather girls give Sally Fields a run for her money, and texting with Lissa and 3 of her friends on the phone.  Finally, at 9 a.m. the next morning, it looked like they might make it.  The eye was upon them.  Lissa texted she was going to shut her phone off for a bit to save the battery.  That was the last time I heard from her.

Around 9:15 or so, a 10-foot storm surge was reported to have hit Cudjoe Key.  Lissa’s stilt house sits 14 feet above the ground, but still, 10 feet of water is quite a force to be reckoned with.  That’s why they call it a SURGE.  I imagined her house ripped off its stilts and sent tumbling.

Days went by.  By the time Irma reached us, she was a Category 1.  We heard a lot of wind, and were reduced to partial power.  As of this moment, we are still on partial power.  Some rooms in my house are completely dark, some have dim lights.  It varies from day to day.  The refrigerator worked intermittently, but seems to have signed off completely now.  Definitely no air conditioning.  Only two of my windows have screens, so I have put fans in front of them to suck in the cooler air when the sun goes down.  I stay up as late as I can, since I don’t want to leave them open once I go to bed, for fear of a break-in.

Still no word from Lissa.  With no cable and no internet, no data on my phone, I had no way to find out what had happened down in the Keys, except for encouraging texts from Lissa’s three friends.  No one really had any information.  The lower keys were cut off.  Isolated.

Finally, the sheriffs (I’m assuming), going door to door as part of a rescue mission, found Lissa and Chris, alive and well, house intact, and allowed them to make a quick call to civilization.  Thank GOD.  Lissa, don’t EVER do that to me again.

So, armed with a generator and loaded with food and water, Lissa and Chris have refused evacuation and are sticking it out on Gilligan’s Island. (No lights, no phone, no motor car, not a single luxury, like Robinson Caruso, it’s primitive as can be.)

Yes, they have drinking water.  No, they have no showers, toilet facilities, etc.  I don’t even want to KNOW where they’re doing their business.  No television, no internet, no phone.  Just the two of them, and the four dogs, for who knows how long.  I’m told the place is devastated. They’re living in a wasteland.

If Lissa has an accident, Chris, it WILL be investigated.  And if something happens to Chris, well, let’s just thank goodness Lissa doesn’t have PMS anymore.

Meanwhile, throughout the state, life is far from normal.  This storm was so large, that even though it struck the west side of the state, it caused massive storm surges on the east side, flooding, destruction and power outages.  Luckily for us, we ended up on the west side of the storm, the weaker side.  People on the east side weren’t so lucky.  Since I have ventured out, I have discovered many of my neighbors still have no power.  Some businesses are running on generators.  The McDonalds where I’m using the wifi right now has a “limited menu” because they’re still waiting on delivery trucks.

Lissa’s friends went on Gas Buddy last night (I still have no data) and were able to steer me in the direction of a gas station that had fuel.  I had been calling all day (using an actual phone book) and found that many of the stations weren’t even bothering to answer their phones.  It is such a relief to have gas again, to be able to get in the car and cool off, to drive somewhere and get wifi and clean out my inbox.

Next week I have appointments for DirecTV and Century Link to replace my cable with satellite.  Hey, I gotta work.  Can’t spend all my time at McDonald’s.  So life goes on.  At least for us.  Lissa and Chris, I think, will be in a state of suspended animation for quite a while, in a gulag of their own making.  Either their relationship will evolve and become stronger, or they won’t be able to stand each other before long.  I would love to be a gecko on the wall…


The Greatest Hoax Ever Played

January 28, 2016


Photo courtesy of, December 8, 2015

I, Donald – legitimate candidate or willing actor for puppeteer Karl Rove?

Not since the movie “The Sting,” has such an elaborate, complex, genius scheme of misdirection been played out on the silver screen or in real life. And the movie reference is appropriate because, in fact, the 2016 election process is so much more reminiscent of a reality television show than the United States electoral process, it’s absolutely uncanny.

On the one hand, we have the self-proclaimed reality television king himself, Donald Trump, posing as a Republican, running his mouth, spouting preposterous ideas that no other candidate in history could possibly get away with, and only gaining more popularity for every crass comment. On the other side of the aisle, Hillary Clinton, the tried and true presumed heir to the throne is suddenly being usurped by a self-acknowledged pie-in-the-sky socialist with lovely thoughts that are completely unfounded in reality. Has the whole country suddenly gone nuts?

When Karl Rove’s ugly mug surfaced on Fox News this morning, I had an epiphany. What if Karl Rove and Donald Trump are working together? Let’s take a step backward.

It’s 2013 and Karl Rove and Donald Trump are trading insults via Twitter about how even with the horrendously vulgar mega-fortunes being foisted upon him by power moguls like Trump and his friends, Karl Rove couldn’t get his lily white Mormon boy elected over a black “Muslim” with a “questionable” birth certificate. Oh the frustration.

Flirting with a bid for the White House as far back as 1988, Donald Trump has dipped his toe in the presidential water on a number of occasions, most notably in a half-hearted attempt to gain the Republication nomination in 2012. He dropped out in favor of his new reality television venture, “The Apprentice,” but not before he had garnered an impressive number of followers. And that certainly didn’t go unnoticed by the likes of Karl Rove.

Now, Donald Trump could never be elected to the White House. Even with a large following of reality-television watching, marginally literate trailer-dwellers, he’s just not electable. No self-respecting American would truly want someone like Donald Trump representing our beautiful nation to the world at large. If you thought George W. Bush was embarrassing — well, we’ve all heard what kind of insulting things the Donald has to say about other cultures.

But after 2012 (if not before), the Republican Party was hopelessly divided. Disillusioned and disenfranchised younger members split off and created the Tea Party, whose radical candidates were also too bizarre to present a viable candidate for the oval office. With no hope of uniting the party under one candidate, and Hillary a shoe-in to follow in Barack Obama’s footsteps, Karl Rove knew he had to do something drastic. He had to pull a sting, and it had to be a big one.

What if he could put up a reality television star who could gain enough of a following to lull the Democrats into a false sense of security? With a party so contentious, most of whom had already surrendered to the idea that Hillary would no doubt win the 2016 election, it wasn’t difficult to rally the numbers around a “defiance” candidate, one who spoke his mind and expressed opinions many secretly harbored in their own dark hearts.

In December 12, 2015, Huffington Post Politics Social Media Editor Ashley Alman wrote: “But in a matchup against Democratic front-runner Hillary Clinton in the general election, Rove wrote, Trump would get ‘creamed.’ He called Trump a ‘dream candidate’ for the Democratic Party.”

Truer words were never spoken, and how ironic if they should be mouthed by the very engineer of this great hoax.  And so now the Democratic Party has let down their guard and allowed themselves to do a little dreaming of their own. Against a legitimate Republican Party candidate, Bernie Sanders would be unelectable. Spouting rainbow rhetoric about universal healthcare and an even economic playing field for all, there’s not a snowball’s chance in Congress that a self-acknowledged Socialist like Sanders could possibly be elected — unless he was running against Donald Trump.

And now, on the eve of the very critical Iowa caucus, Trump drops out of a critical Republican debate, giving the real candidates the opportunity to hash out the nomination amongst themselves. Is it the action of a petulant, egomaniacal corporate bully, or is he really just playing out the last act in his reality television drama? He could then blame his resulting decline in popularity as a simple miscalculation. After all, his three previous bankruptcies would seem to evince that the Donald is not infallible.

Is this scenario even possible? Could two purported enemies the likes of Karl Rove and Donald Trump actually devise such an elaborate, evil scheme, let alone work together? Is either one of them intelligent enough? You decide.

No Such Thing as Free

August 27, 2015

Hey Lissa, want to know the latest scam?  “Free samples.”  They send you an email saying, “want to get free samples of all kinds of products?”  And you think, that might be nice.  Who doesn’t want free samples?  But each and every one of them are the same. When you click on them they make you fill out a survey, then they take you to other free sample sites who also make you fill out a survey, and if you click on any products, you have to fill out a survey for them and you NEVER actually get any free samples.  They’re a SCAM.  Each time you fill out your information or just provide your email, the SITE gets paid by a variety of sources who are collecting information, some of whom are other free sample or coupon sites who want to send you an email and do the same thing.

The ONLY people getting anything out of this are the scammers with the websites.  I repeat, there are NO FREE SAMPLES.  Just a lot of hassle.  DELETE these emails, or better yet, open them and unsubscribe.

Thank you peewee

July 17, 2015

Just hearing about other peoples dreams or nightmares helps a lot!! yes there is some insecurity going on here with my hubby retiring.

Retirement is a total stress on a relationship!!!!

America’s Got Idiots

July 15, 2015

OMG Lissa, I was just watching the latest America’s Got Talent and the showcased “talent” was a skydiver who exited a helicopter directly over the target and sucked it down to about 150 feet or less before deploying his parachute. Seriously, that is the most irresponsible and embarrassing representation of the sport that I have ever seen. He didn’t even land on a specific target, since he didn’t have time to set up a proper landing. What a complete loser!

I know the TV folks are always looking for ratings, and maybe it seemed like good TV, but for anyone who knows anything about the sport of skydiving, it was just a really stupid, idiotic stunt. How many people do we know who suck it down to a really dangerous altitude just for a rush or for some attention? It takes no talent whatsoever. Only an idiot would do such a thing. So all I can conclude is that the show is not actually America’s Got Talent, but America’s Got Idiots.

When you and your second husband, then the parachuting golden Knights US skydiving team Captain, jumped from that low altitude ‘fun hop and pop’ jump ….your parachute tangled
You broke your back …. Wasn’t that the same kind of thing as that stupidity?

No, Lissa, that was an accident.  There’s a difference.  And if the idiot on America’s Got Talent had had his parachute open with any sort of malfunction or delay, he would have been toast.


July 14, 2015

Hey peewee,

Do you ever have nightmares where you think you are halfway awake and something freakingly evil is trying to take over your soul? When you feel like you should wake up but maybe you really are awake? And terrifying frightening stuff is happening around you like in the horror movies?

Then you realize you can’t move, scream or wake up fully? I had that last night. Those nightmares are worse than the ones where you realize you are naked in public. Worse than the ones where you are able to fly but just not high or fast enough to evade your predators or clear the obstacles in your path!

Are these dreams/nightmares common to everyone do you think? Or my neuroses manifesting in my sleep? Or something we eat before bed?

I don’t know, Lissa, I don’t have nightmares anymore, just really weird dreams. Somewhere along the line I learned to wake myself up when I was having a nightmare, by kicking out a foot or something. I remember the last few nightmares I had were kind of like you described, where I dreamt that I was awake but I wasn’t.

I think it was my subconscious trying to trick me into having a nightmare. I remember I was in bed in a hotel room one night, trying to sleep, and I was staring at the door when it slowly started to open. (Kind of like a recurring nightmare I had when I was a kid, where I would stare at the closet door, and it would slowly open and monsters would start to spill out.) Instinctively I kicked out my foot and woke myself up, but then as I was laying there, the door started to open — again! I was really still having the nightmare. This went on a few more times until I suddenly realized that the view I had of the door that my subconscious was using for the nightmare was actually from a different perspective — it was from when I had been sitting up in bed earlier, and it looked different than the view I had lying down. And that was the last nightmare I ever had.

Now when I’m having a really weird dream, sometimes I’ll stop and think, this is really weird, is this a dream? And I’ll jump up in the air to see if I can fly, and if I can, then I know it’s a dream. Then I take over the dream and just go do whatever I want. It’s really fun.

It sounds to me like you are feeling helpless about something, Lissa. Maybe you’re worried about TCB’s upcoming retirement. That’s bound to be a huge change in lifestyle for both of you. Could someone be feeling a little, cough, cough, suffocated?


Hot Fun in the Summertime…

July 12, 2015

Boy, Lissa, I sure needed that week off in Myrtle Beach.  It really cleared my head, and gave me a chance to figure out what I want to do with my life and how to go about getting there.  Not to mention it was really wonderful to see our dad again.  Never know how many more opportunities there may be to spend time with family.

Not that it was all fun and games — nine hours at a shot in the car with a cranky, carsick 10-year-old is no picnic.  He did surprisingly well, though, and we made it there and back without any major incidents.  We also explored Broadway at the Beach, and that upside down house, the Wonder Works.  He also got to run in one of those water wheels, but i couldn’t talk him into the zipline…

I didn’t realize until after we got home, though, that I didn’t get any pictures of the kid with his grandparents. Total bummer. All I had was my stupid cell phone because my camera battery died and couldn’t be recharged. Rats.

Oh well, we did get to spend some quality time together, which was really nice. Our father looks great — back to his old self. They both have their health issues, but they seem to be managing well in the housing arrangement there. Elaine and I even got in the pool for some pool aerobics, which actually turned out to be a pretty good workout (considering what a vegetable I’ve been for so long). Also the kid and I spent one afternoon at the water park, and I actually made it up all those stairs for the different slides (and so did the kid!).

All in all, it was a much needed break. Hopefully I can get something going so that I will be able to take a lot more breaks in the coming years…


You dingdog peewee!!!

if you could picture take pictures like you did of the kid you could’ve taken pictures of daddy and you could’ve handed your phone off for somebody to take pictures of you all.

I don’t take a camera anywhere I use my old  cell phone      Who needs a camera.     The photos you took with yourself phone of the kids proves that.