Do you ever have nightmares where you think you are halfway awake and something freakingly evil is trying to take over your soul? When you feel like you should wake up but maybe you really are awake? And terrifying frightening stuff is happening around you like in the horror movies?
Then you realize you can’t move, scream or wake up fully? I had that last night. Those nightmares are worse than the ones where you realize you are naked in public. Worse than the ones where you are able to fly but just not high or fast enough to evade your predators or clear the obstacles in your path!
Are these dreams/nightmares common to everyone do you think? Or my neuroses manifesting in my sleep? Or something we eat before bed?
I don’t know, Lissa, I don’t have nightmares anymore, just really weird dreams. Somewhere along the line I learned to wake myself up when I was having a nightmare, by kicking out a foot or something. I remember the last few nightmares I had were kind of like you described, where I dreamt that I was awake but I wasn’t.
I think it was my subconscious trying to trick me into having a nightmare. I remember I was in bed in a hotel room one night, trying to sleep, and I was staring at the door when it slowly started to open. (Kind of like a recurring nightmare I had when I was a kid, where I would stare at the closet door, and it would slowly open and monsters would start to spill out.) Instinctively I kicked out my foot and woke myself up, but then as I was laying there, the door started to open — again! I was really still having the nightmare. This went on a few more times until I suddenly realized that the view I had of the door that my subconscious was using for the nightmare was actually from a different perspective — it was from when I had been sitting up in bed earlier, and it looked different than the view I had lying down. And that was the last nightmare I ever had.
Now when I’m having a really weird dream, sometimes I’ll stop and think, this is really weird, is this a dream? And I’ll jump up in the air to see if I can fly, and if I can, then I know it’s a dream. Then I take over the dream and just go do whatever I want. It’s really fun.
It sounds to me like you are feeling helpless about something, Lissa. Maybe you’re worried about TCB’s upcoming retirement. That’s bound to be a huge change in lifestyle for both of you. Could someone be feeling a little, cough, cough, suffocated?